A joke

Okay, I'm actually too bored so I'd decided to post at least one thing; though it could be really trashy or crappy, well, any of those could help letting my endless boredom wane. 

First, I'd say I'm so happy that i wouldn't be taken up with studying or going to school early in the morning. I don't think which seems more likely to be complained about - lack of freedom at school or the short of fanatics at home.

Then, I may have to start deciding what I'm gotta do next because I'm already 19 years old, and often I heard people saying that a 19-years-old is compelled to shoulder a larger obligations than which he or she had had before. So, I decided to go to work after my parents' all persuading sessions to prod me into experiencing a new sense of living in an unprecedented society. 

It was my first time working in a very small architecture firm. On the very first day, I got there and took a deep breath before yanking the door open. Then, I hardly realised the door was locked due to the security system somewhere near the door, and I tried a little harder until I found out a lady's head popped out into the transparent glass of the door above a mosaic layer of translucence. And, I heard a short sensor beep before entering that room. 

I practised a short speech across my mind. I came out with the first sentence by saying I was here for the work. I took a seat before the admin's table as requested and waited. She broke the silence, "Are you John's son?" 

I heard her saying 'Jong' which is my father's surname and immediately I answered her with a nod, "yes."

The lady asked me to wait and I waited for a very long time before I braced up myself to ask her the current location of the boss. I strained myself not to be distracted by the rock music blaring out through the door from the staffroom which was beside the admin's office.

She said that my boss wouldn't be so early to show up. Maybe he would come at 10 o'clock or thereabouts. I sneaked a swift peek at my watch, and i was so impressed by myself for being so punctual. It was not yet 8 am. Then, it was that foreboding silence again.

I flashed on the conversation between me and my dad. My father had said the boss is one of his best friends; well, actually those friends who like to go out with him for a nice hangover will always be presumed as his 'best friend'. I was quite ignorant at first because later based on my future colleagues' hearsay evidence, he is not seldom being punctual because of the strong alcoholic effect from the previous night. 

One fateful night, my father popped over to me after my big exam - SPM to tell me that i have been hired for a job in an architecture firm. I stared at him with my eyes widely open. He explained I could learn a lot of things from the job by being exposed to the architecture field. After that I stammered, "B-b-bu-but I have plan for my holidays (very long holidays)." After all, at the end he still seemed to be so obstinate about his intention for me to get that job, in addition with the support of my family, so i gave in.

I dare bet the staffs thinking that i was hired not due to my qualification (I'm merely a school leaver), but was due to the special friendship between my father and my future boss. I could have already pictured them looking down on me. 

Back to the story. So, i asked the admin lady a few questions, such as the number of the employees, the working hours of my job and time of the lunch break. Her name is Daffney. She brought me around the staffroom where there were employees close enough to the total number, the small pantry and the bathrooms of both genders. 

My watch showed it was 9.00 am before Daffney picked up her phone and apparently i could see that the person on the other end of the line was Uncle Harry, my boss. I listened and knew he gave his orders to Daffney regarding my first chore. I was so prepared for it.

I was disappointed by my first chore because it seemed to be so easy. It was just typing some sorts of contracts. It's okay because i believed i could help them by converting the hard copies into soft copies. 

It took me about 2 weeks to complete that particular chore and i lost count of how many pages I had typed. I kept myself busy by the following chores in such tedious doldrums- scanning pictures, searching for images of the materials required for the interior designers and architects, logging on into Facebook (so chicken not to do it during working hours but only during lunch break, indeed I'm compliant.. err I think 'obedient' will be a more positive word to describe me.) and more.  Day by day, I listened to my colleagues' conversation and acknowledged the depth of the commitments in their work, their perceptions towards their boss, their thoughts, and all behaviours.  

There were 3 Philippines there, 1 only Malay and the others were Chinese. Daffney introduced me to the employees and from there I knew their names. After some days getting along with them, i gained some insights about the people, proprieties and society. I'll say this much - some were unpretentious, kind and down-to-earth; however, some were obsequious who like to put up their façades in order to suck up to their boss, some were double-faced by stabbing deeply at the back of the boss, and also some were frank to fume and swear headlong. In that case, I had to be careful by all means with my sentence because they could do things at the back of the boss and they might do so at the back of you.

I knew more about the taboo subject that shouldn't be converse with anyone in the staffroom, for an instance, the salary. Out of curiosity I asked one of my colleagues about their pay and they tried to evade my question. It struck me hard as I had asked the wrong question. Along the way back home, I told my mum about this matter and she talked me through which there are quite a few sensitive topic that I couldn't hit, like family affairs, company's troubles and of course, the salary. If I hit them, I'll sure hit anyone's raw nerves.

People always judge others, and may look down on somebody with lower qualification. I got the job due to relationships of my boss with my dad and not due to my qualification, of course some employees tended to patronise me. I always thought that Daffney was nice but I was wrong. During the days when boss went to other places for business, she'd like to utter a stream of fuck you, damn you and more (especially when the boss is going to come back to work). It's like "Fuck, why'd you come back so early? Fuck" I didn't know she kept the intends in her mind for so long to fuck her boss…but later she added," No fuck, damn you. I'll rather die than fucking you."

The second last day I worked there, early in the morning when there were only a few people, I asked her if my boss got any chores assigned to me. She shook her head but I could see that she was frowning. I assumed that she's not in the mood or perhaps she was annoyed by me asking her questions. I got back to my seat inside the staffroom. Like any other day, I waited for more people to attend and to ask them for chores in order to help them out. Scarcely had I seated, Daffney called me out from the admin office. Just for the instant I had reached her office, I was already searching for an out. She asked me to go to the post office by foot to pay the bills.

 My facial expression must have stunned her as I sensed the blood was draining away from my face.  She did a double take to my first head-on rejection to do her a favour. "What earthly reason you don't know the directions to the post office. Plus, even a woman like me can go to pay the bills, and as a man," her stare’s like bayonet sizing me up, “you don't know how to do so?” I thought I got my intents crystal clear that the hell I didn't know where the post office was. Immediately her words went at me, "with a mouth of yours, you can go down to anybody and ask about the directions." My legs steadfastly stemmed into the ground, seeming too heavy to elevate. Suddenly I hated it myself to have difficulties to ask strangers questions, and thanks to the timid chicken inside me, I was currently sitting on the ground zero.

A more approachable female architect come to us before Daffney with all revulsion and reluctance asked a female architect, Ms Theng, to show me the directions to the post office. Her body language was clear enough to understand:  a hand sweeping her fringe aside and leaning her forehead upon her palm, revealing she's quite as much to displeasure.

Ms Theng awkwardly laughed off the tension and charge, leading me to the boss's office (Uncle Harry wasn't there at that time). After she guided me through the directions, out of my concern I couldn't help myself asking Ms Theng for her phone number to call her if I was lost at nowhere. Oh no, my mind screamed, that cowardly nutcase inside me resurfaced.

"Forget it," Daffney intervened. On the cue, she was heading towards us, apparently having been listening to our conversation, and her words hung like a blade, in such that I couldn't find my voice. She snapped out with a condescending look that for all she'd go to the office herself as she's aware that my father might blame them for leaving me going to the post office alone in case I was lost. She picked up her chores where she left off, her voice’s as sharp as a laser, “Do you know what? You ought to earn as much money as possible for you to hire a personal chauffeur. Therefore, you’ll not be worried about getting lost again.”

WTH you pompous ass, don’t you dare judge me! Like I care, I can snatch those bills off your hands and straight go to the post office all by myself!

I fought off that combative thought, forcing out a wry smile at her and went back to job. I felt my heart was stabbed really deep at this time. I kept myself knee-deep in job so that I'd not be put off by all the harsh memories. My shell-shocked look as though revealed the crushing blow of disdain of myself.

Another total joke of me is on another fateful day. That day, everyone's commitment in their job faded because of the long hours of working out their projects. Carren, one of the female Philippines stood beside me to watch me doing the colouring. I glanced up at her and asked her if she needed me to do her a favour. She shook her head while chewed some food in her mouth and said with a peeled orange in the palm of her hand that she was just relaxing. It seemed to be wrecking awkward to watch me for so long doing this and hence, I simply asked her bluntly the reason nobody did the colouring as long as I'd seen since the first day I was there. She talked me through the importance of the colouring on their projects' and district council's behalf. I didn't know I had given her the impression that doing the colouring was sort of stupid job. She told me that it was necessary and important, much as it seemed to be stupid. I denied the fact that it was stupid (I was actually having fun doing this). Then, Amelia, a female interior designer with a heavy-built and plump body confessed the fact that she could have paid me money to swap her job with me - she did the colouring while I did her computerised sketching of plan. I still couldn't get what she said and told her to buy a colouring book for herself to colour as much as she could at home. Immediately this cranked them up. And it straight hit home. My face absolutely reddened when I saw them bent double with laughter.

Then I knew I had made a joke of myself. I couldn't get more upset than that.